AFL 2 years ago

Cats and Lions nag a ram

  • Cats and Lions nag a ram

Let me open by saying that Round 2 wasn’t as enjoyable as Round 1. Well, for me anyway. North, Sydney and the Bulldogs got the four points as expected, but GWS, Gold Coast, and most surprisingly Essendon, claimed upset wins. Collingwood snatched victory out of the yellow and black jaws of defeat, which caused a lot of fingers to be pointed firmly in the direction of Punt Road. Trent Cotchin, despite 38 possessions, copped the worst of it, with everything from his leadership ability to his choice of hair care product being questioned. And reports of Hawthorn’s demise were a tad premature.

 Geelong’s loss to the Giants, stopped supporters (myself included) from getting ahead of themselves. Hopefully, the shorter break combined with a blockbuster hangover had something to do with it despite Chris Scott’s assertion that it didn’t.

 And while I understand the reasoning behind the crackdown on the deliberate out of bounds rule, things might be getting a little out of hand. There are incidents where the umpires are still getting it wrong. At one point I think I saw a free kick awarded against a centre bounce hit out that went vaguely in the direction of the wing.

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 For flip’s sake, the grounds we play on are OVAL, they have been for over 100 years. Are they now suggesting that we are not allowed to play on the outer sections of the field?

 Let me just postulate a theory

 We all know the AFL has its eyes set on world domination: taking the game to all corners of the globe to indoctrinate foreigners into the way of the drop punt.

But there is already a game out there with billions of global devotees that is played on a field without unnecessary curved outer edges. Ironically, it is also called football. Perhaps this decree to deter players from playing near the boundary line is the first step in “soccerizing” our game and turning football supporters into footy supporters.

 If they decide to hang a net off the goalposts, I’m going home.

 But I digress.

 This week ‘Serbia lobs in’ as the Brisbane Lions travel down to ‘Sodium and mists’ to take on the Geelong Cats ‘to clean eggs’. A win here is imperative for ‘Lone egg’, Geelong to maintain their finals bona fides. There are many crucial battles will determine the outcome. From the opening bounce, curbing the influence of ‘faster tin man’, Stefan Martin will fall on the shoulders of Rhys Stanley. I hope he isn’t ‘astern shyly’.  The midfield battle should also be a cracker. With the absence of ‘lock it off Mr’ Tom Rockliff and he with the ‘badman eyes’, Dayne Beams, ‘Illness enchanter’, Allen Christensen and the ‘nerdy kazoo’, Dayne Zorko look to have their work cut out. The likes of ‘Mr black visa’, Mark Blicavs and that ‘danged flier’, Dangerfield will definitely keep them on their toes. Kicking goals will also be important. If he with the ‘ski mown hat’, Tom Hawkins can get the better of ‘’lamented trier’ and ‘nettle admirer’, Daniel Merrett, Geelong’s chances will significantly improve.

 I’m not even going to mention Jake Kolojashnij.


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