AFL 2 years ago

Lies, wind & bad stereotypes

  • Lies, wind & bad stereotypes

I really don’t know why you haven’t seen last week’s article. I swear that I put it in the mail. And if you believe that, might I add: My phone died, I ‘have’ read the terms and conditions, and it’s not you, it’s me.

 So I’ll quickly run through it for you. Hawkins kicked four, the usual suspects played well and we won by 69 points.

 Yesterday it was Essendon at the MCG. Geelong were supposed to smash those topped-up, upper Maribyrnong upstarts, but it didn’t turn out that way. Essendon came to play. Pardon the pun, but they really brought the juice and had a crack.: they won the contested possessions, the uncontested possessions and the clearances. The only place they didn’t win was on the scoreboard. As the Essendon players tired in the last quarter, Geelong’s superior fitness and strength shone through as they finally put some scoreboard space between themselves and the Bombers.

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 It was also inaccurate kicking by the Cats that kept the Bombers in the contest. At one point in the last quarter, Geelong’s previous 12 scores read 1.11. (Even Travis Cloke can do better than that.) However, I am somewhat forgiving because from what I saw on my televisual receiving device, shots that were initially on target were whisked away at the last moment by swirly gusts of wind.

 Overall it was nice to get a 30-point win despite not playing at our optimum.

 Hopefully there will be a bit more pizazz and grunt when we come up against Port Adelaide next week. If one is to believe all the talkback hubbub, then that game will be played somewhere in the vicinity of the China Sea.

This week, Port Adelaide announced that sometime in the future, they will be playing an AFL game for premiership points in Shanghai. The AFL is 100% behind it, as they seek to take our game to the world.

 But what will the Chinese make of Australian Rules football?

Will they embrace it with gusto?

Or will they be confused by the fact there are 4 giant chopsticks at each end of the ground?

Will they get unexplainable hunger pains when they watch the Cats or the Dogs?

 If they do adopt the game, and eventually get their own team, there are a few positives we could count on:

·      The chance for an AFL first; someone called Wing could actually line up on himself.

·      Being competitive would not be a problem, if things weren’t going to plan; all they’d have to do is bring back the female swimming team from the 1994 world championships. With their size and strength, they would slot straight in to AFL football.

·      And when the ball is in their forward line, they would have no problem keeping it there by building the wall, we know for a fact that they’re good at that

 At the very least if we do see an AFL team from China, we know there will be no illegal gambling issues; it’s a common knowledge that China doesn’t like Tibet.

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